Saturday 28 April 2012

Things that can cause your friendship to frizzle

Most times when we're young we think that the friends we have then, would be the friends we have later on in life. Most times we're wrong and here's a list of things that can cause your friendship to end. 



Money

Loaning money to anyone is naturally an issue. One person would worry about when they’re going to get it back, the other party may be bothered by having to borrow it. The lender should be able to say to themselves, “if I don’t get this money back, it’s okay because it’s not worth my friendship.” The borrower in turn, should be thinking, “I really need to pay my friend back. She looked out when I needed her most”. Any other setup, just won’t work. When money is lent and not paid back, it’s typically time to pack it up.

Relationships

She dislikes your boo and doesn’t want to be around him. You’re so in love, you don’t even notice that you two barely talk anymore and she hardly comes over. The thing is, a true friend wouldn’t allow her opinion of your new lover to affect the relationship she has with you. She doesn’t have to be around him, but she can still let you have your moment.  On the low, she’d probably only come around when she knows he’s not there but that’s still cool.  The chances of that really happening are slim though. Why does she hate him so much anyway? It could be all of those fights you told her about. Maybe it was the admittance of your suspicions that he’s cheating. Either way, you can’t tell your friend something and expect her to be as forgiving of him as you may be. Ultimately, your girl will be looking at you funny because she doesn’t comprehend why you’re still with such a jerk. Be cautious of the things you share with regard to your relationship. Every disagreement is not for your girl to hear.

Telling Secrets

As an adult, no one should have to tell their friend to keep a secret. Discretion should be practice without fail. The easiest way to lose a friend is to relinquish information they trusted you with. A simple sorry doesn’t fix that type of disloyalty. Assume that most things told to you shouldn’t be shared. Be like most people, and tell someone else who doesn’t know your friend personally. C’mon now…everybody does that.

Lack of Support

Every time you turn around, your friend has a different plan for her life. First, she wants to be a doctor. Then she wants to be a teacher. Now she wants to be a stripper. If she told you tomorrow that she wanted to be a guidance counselor, you should support her. Support would involve asking her about her process, congratulating her on her goal progression, and encouraging her when she’s feeling off her game. Anything else will feel like the act of a hater, particularly if she’s always been your cheerleader. It won’t take long before your friend doesn’t feel like she matters.

Being Competitive

Yes, imitation is the highest form of flattery. However, it seems like every time you get something, your friend either gets the same item or tries to one up you. When you guys were younger, it was probably pretty cool. Now that you’re all grown up, you don’t want to share your style. It’s important to understand and accept each others individuality. If that aspect of your friendship is not nurtured, prepare to feel stifled, if not utterly irritated.

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